Pet memorial ideas: ways to remember a dog or cat who has died
Losing a dog or cat is losing a member of the family, and there is no right way to remember them. Some people want something to hold, such as a collar or a paw print. Others want something to do, such as planting a tree or giving to a shelter in their name. Here are ideas of both kinds, including the few that can only be done in the first days, and some help for the rest of the household.
Keepsakes to gather in the first days
A few keepsakes can only be made at the time. If your pet is old or unwell, it can help to know about them now.
- A paw print. In clay or ink. Many vets will make one if you ask, and kits for doing it at home are easy to find.
- A clipping of fur. A small lock, kept in an envelope, a locket or a frame.
- Their collar and tag. Keep them as they are, or hang them where the lead used to hang.
- Photos and videos from everyone. Ask family and friends to send theirs now, before they get lost in camera rolls. Keep the originals at full size.
- Their sounds. A bark, a purr, the jingle of a tag. These are often in the background of videos, so keep those too.
If your pet is still with you, take ordinary photos and videos now: on the sofa, at the door, on a walk. The everyday ones are the ones people miss most.
Deciding on burial or cremation
Your vet can explain the options where you live, and can arrange most of them.
- Burial at home, where local rules allow it, deep enough and away from water.
- A pet cemetery, with a plot you can visit.
- Cremation, either shared, or individual so the ashes come back to you.
Ashes can be kept in an urn, scattered on a favorite walk, buried under a new tree, or set into a small piece of jewelry. There is no hurry to decide what to do with them.
Things to make from their photos
- A framed photo, printed large, of the picture that is most like them.
- A portrait, painted or drawn by an artist from your photos.
- A photo book of their life, from puppy or kitten to their last year. Making it can be part of grieving, not only the result.
- A cushion, blanket or ornament with their face on it.
- An animated likeness. We make Pawsome Family, which turns 1 to 5 photos of a dog or cat into a small animated pet that walks along the bottom of your Chrome tabs. Some people find comfort in having their pet back on their screen. Others find it too soon, or not something they want at all, and both are fine. Older photos can work as long as your pet is clear and in good light. Our help page on which photos work best explains what to choose.
A place to remember them
- A spot in the garden. Plant a tree, a shrub or their favorite patch of grass, and mark it with a stone carrying their name.
- A place on their favorite walk. Some parks let you put a plaque on a bench. Even without one, the walk itself can be the place you go.
- A small shelf at home, with a photo, their collar and something they loved.
- Words. A letter to them, a list of the things only they did, or the stories the family tells about them. Written down, they last.
Doing something in their name
- Give to an animal shelter or rescue in their name.
- Pass on what they left. Many shelters accept unopened food, clean bedding and toys. Ask first, because each has its own rules.
- Give your time. Walk dogs at a shelter, or foster a pet who needs a home for a while.
- Mark the day. A walk on their birthday, or on the anniversary, with the people who knew them.
Helping children through it
- Use clear words. Say that the pet has died. Phrases like “put to sleep” or “went away” can make young children afraid of sleep, or leave them waiting for the pet to come back.
- Let them take part. Drawing a picture, choosing a photo for the frame or helping plant a tree gives them something to do with the feeling.
- Answer questions simply and truthfully, and expect the same questions more than once.
- Let them see you are sad. It shows them that grief is normal, and that it is all right to talk about.
Other pets grieve too
A dog or cat who has lost a companion may search the house, call out, eat less, sleep more or become clingy. Keep their routine as steady as you can: the same meals, the same walks, and a little extra time together.
Most settle within a few weeks. If a pet stops eating, see your vet. For a cat, a day or two without food is already a reason to call.
When grief is hard
Grief for a pet can be as deep as grief for a person, and the people around you may not understand that. Trouble sleeping, losing your appetite, and listening for them at the door are all normal.
- Talk to people who knew them. Shared stories help more than advice.
- Ask your vet about support. Many animal charities and veterinary schools run free pet loss support lines, and your vet can point you to one.
- If you chose euthanasia, guilt is common, and so is going over the decision again and again. It is often the last kindness an owner can give, made because it was right for the pet.
- If grief stops you getting through ordinary days for weeks at a time, talk to your doctor.
When to think about another pet
There is no right time. Some families welcome a new pet within weeks, and others wait years or decide not to. A new dog or cat will not replace the one you lost. They will be their own animal, with their own habits, and in time, their own place in the family.
When you are ready, our guide to the first week with a new dog or cat covers what to have ready.